Poem: Passing Moments Through A Beating Heart

No one can see me through my facade, No one can see through my painted face, They don’t know my wishes to God, They don’t know me when I’m alone, Sitting in this darkness is sometimes comforting, Separated from the world outside leaves me sane, Counting the lost moments while my heart is beating, Still better here than the pain that awaits me, I try to see my reflection but my eyes won’t adjust, Maybe that is better for I might hate what I see, I want to release my misery but there is no one I trust, More moments pass, at least my heart still beats, My mind wonders into a place I call home, Deep inside my imagination lies my favorite illusion, I convince myself that it is better to live alone, Maybe I fear I am right, which is why I dare not prove my hypothesis, Silence is holly to me theses days, I worship it each time I am blessed with its presence, Pain creeps in through the noise in many ways, I try to filter it out but fail in my attempts, Still my heart beats while more moments pass by, My illusion infiltrated by the noise causes more pain, Here comes another night that I will lie awake and cry, Wanting the moments and my beating heart to just go away.